Why I'm Going to Try to Minimize My Social Media Use

I Fully Understand if You Roll Your Eyes Right Now

So, I’ve been hesitant to quit social media, despite more and more evidence it’s bad for you, for the following reasons:

1. I’m good at it

Most of my more visible accomplishments have been on social media. GSUFYO, most notably, but in general I’m proud of the presence I have on social media and the reputation I’ve earned.

2. Community

I’ve moved 4 times since 2016, and it’s been hard for me to not really have roots, especially considering that I am not the most outgoing person in the world. It’s been hard, and social media has been a lifeline to maintain a sense of community for me.

3. I learn a lot

I get exposed to all sorts of new ideas and new perspectives, and Twitter has genuinely been a really great experience in just having conversations with the whole world. It’s been really valuable to my development as a thinker to be exposed to that.

4. Ok, maybe a little bit addicted to scrolling.

5. The whole “people from the internet gave me a ton of money when I really needed it”

Lately, though, what with all the social media companies either crashing or actively making their products worse, I’m wondering whether the costs outweigh the benefits. Yes, I learn a lot, but how much of that gets actually applied when I waste so much time just scrolling? Yes, it gives me a sense of community I currently don’t have, but can I really call relationships with people I’ve never met who interact with me only through praise and criticism a “community”? Yes, I have an online following, but do I have friends? And the friends I have, have I been paying attention to them or neglecting them because interacting with someone one on one lacks the thrill of a viral post?

Most worrying of all, am I locking myself into a trajectory where the only people who talk to me are those who offer unqualified praise? Am I losing my ability to think independently because I’m always tailoring my content to the audience? Yes, tailoring to the audience is good within reason, but can it go too far? I can feel my self slipping away from myself, and I want to stop that slide before it goes too far.

I don’t want to disconnect myself from the world, though. I do want an audience that holds me accountable. I do, obviously, want a community of people I can talk to, run ideas by, discuss interesting things, and just talk. I do still want to produce content, because I do think I have some interesting things to say. But I don’t think social media is a healthy way to do it anymore.

The producing content part is easy to replace. I have this substack, after all. And my hope is that taking a break will free me up to do more stuff.

But I do want to keep conversations going. Because that’s what brings me to social media, not the chance to spread what I think, but to hear what other people think, to throw out ideas and see if they work, to get instant feedback. I’m less addicted to social media than I am to feedback. Being able to present an idea and then more or less instantly getting feedback has been really wonderful. And judging from the money thrown at me, people like having those conversations with me.

I don’t know how to replace social media for that. I don’t even know if it can be done. That might be the point. That I need to make that process less dependent on likes and reactions and more dependent on the actual work of conversation, and talking less to a faceless mob than to individuals or small groups. There are benefits to this. Smaller groups means more trust, which means more freedom.

So if you want to keep these conversations going, I did make a Discord server. The hope is that it becomes not just a “read Akiva’s stuff and give me feedback” server, but a place in which conversations about Torah can happen less formally, collaboration can be made easier, and we can build not just a loose affiliation of scholars, but a real community of learning. A place that can be a laboratory for Torah, where people try out ideas before they take them to the masses. I’m still figuring out Discord, but my hope is that it can be a platform for this sort of thing.

Though it cuts against my anti-elitism, that group will have to stay pretty small for the whole thing to work. I figure that if you’ve read all the way to the end of this piece, I probably would like you to join. I’m going to put the link behind the paywall. If you really want to join but can’t afford to subscribe, let me know.