On Being a Torah Fan

Just Thinking Aloud on the Nature of My Relationship with Torah

One of my favorite podcasts, Hardcore History, is hosted by a man named Dan Carlin, who is very insistent that he is not a historian. “I’m not a historian,” he reminds listeners, “I’m just a history fan”

I have realized recently that I think of myself as more of a Torah Fan than a producer of Torah, for the most part.

What do I mean by this?

What makes a fan a “fan” is that they are not participants in the object of their fandom. They don’t play on the teams, they don’t write the books or produce the movies, they’re just people who support the team/love the stories or what have you.

To a certain extent I don’t see myself as a participant in the production of Torah, though I’m always trying to change that. I am not an expert on halacha. I know enough of it to pass my semikha exams, and enough of it to know where it is I should look for the answer to a question, but do not feel like I am someone who people should rely on halakhically. I see people who are able to recall the exact opinions in debates on minute halakhic details and I am envious. I do not have that level of mastery.